maricord

  • Hidden Beach

    Back in 2012, I was given a chance to go boat riding around the small islands off the coast of Sipalay, Negros Occidental. The place was so secluded that local people aptly call it Tinagong Dagat (Hidden Beach). 

    It’s beautiful and peaceful out there where one could only hear the gust of the wind, the soft trickle of the waves and the occasional cries of the birds. Its stillness was shattered only by the sound of the fishermen’s motored bancas. We saw a few nipa huts in some of the islands and most of them were empty. Maybe they serve as a resting place for the fishermen. We saw a few of them minding their nets in the clear and shallow waters. 

    While I savored the beauty of the place, I was also aware of its vulnerability. We all know that many of the mountains of Negros Occidental are barren due to decades of mindless logging and mining operations. Soil erosion and mine wastes have accumulated much on the sea coasts of the province especially in Sipalay. The islets of Tinagong Dagat have remained pristine. I dearly hope that we, especially the government, will see to it that this wonder of nature remains untouched by so-called progress. 

    Man and nature are connected said one learned farmer to me. Recent natural disasters have proven that to be true. I pray that, in the present rush to develop the Sipalay-Hinobaan area as a major tourist spot, the government and the developers will not only look at the locality with its beautiful beaches, coral reefs and vegetation as a means to gain profit but also as a vital support system that must be sustained so that the organisms that are thriving there at present may continue to exist.

  • This Too Shall Pass

    I am feeling down today. Everything feels wrong. I tried getting busy to keep away these dark thoughts from my mind. I cleaned the bathroom, I went down to the basement to do my two-week-old laundry, and threw away the trash. But it didn’t help. It made me even more tired. I tried to finish the book I’ve been reading for almost a month, but after reading a few sentences, I got bored and threw it away. Then, I logged in to Netflix and watched Marie Kondo. I thought maybe she could spark some joy on me, but I ended up being pissed with Marie Kondo. Don’t get me wrong, I love her. But today is not my day to like her.

    My head feels so heavy that I thought I should get a haircut, but then I realized that my hair is already short, and I got a haircut two weeks ago because I was also depressed back then. Haircuts sometimes relieve me from depression. It somewhat lightens the heavy feeling in my head, but I don’t want to do it today because I don’t want to go bald. That would be embarrassing. So I put on my shoes and decided to take a walk. The cloudy weather dampened my mood even more. Still, I kept going with my earphones on as it blasted Smetana’s The Moldau. It was beautiful, and I thought what a genius Smetana was. His folks back in Prague must be very proud of him. Did he get depressed too? Then I looked up and watched the tangled branches of the trees swayed with the wind, and I felt sad. I passed by the gasoline station, and the guy who always pumped gas in my car waved at me. I waved back and sweetly smiled at him. It didn’t change my mood, though.

    I know I shouldn’t be whining. There are people out there who are feeling worse than I am. But I couldn’t help it. I don’t know why I am ranting right now. I don’t usually do this. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not lonesome. There are days that I just feel sad, and today is that day. I don’t want people to talk to me or ask me why because I don’t know the answer and I don’t want them to tell me that everything will be alright. Don’t worry about me. Like Greta Garbo, I just want to be left alone to drown my sorrow.

    I’m back home now, lying on my bed and trying to get some sleep. I know that when I wake up and go to work later, everything will be fine because, just like before, ‘this too shall pass’.

  • Remembering Rimbaud

    I remember after Titanic, there was a movie by Leonardo DiCaprio that was released in Manila. It was about the poet Arthur Rimbaud and his unique friendship with fellow poet Paul Verlaine. I was reading Rimbaud’s poetry then, and I didn’t know anything about him. I didn’t have access to the internet and books. So, I was very keen to watch the movie. I asked my cousins if they’d watched it with me. Of course, they said yes. They’re very excited because it’s Leo and it’s free. It was a weird and different kind of love story so much so that when we got out of the theater, they turned to me and said, “Damn you, Mar. What the hell did you make us watch?” They seemed shocked and confused. I wonder if my sweet cousins still remember the movie… and Rimbaud.

  • That Time When A Hippo Made Me Think

    I am a slow learner. It takes a lot of time and great effort for me to comprehend things, much more to think. This irritates me so much that I sometimes ask myself: am I stupid?

    Having said that, I must add that my mind does dabble in matters philosophical. Well, sort of, at least. This does not happen all the time. It does so only when it is transfixed by something unusual or beautiful.

    As what happened one midnight. I was watching a television show. I couldn’t understand what it was about. What the heck, I couldn’t care less. All I wanted was to go to sleep, but I couldn’t. As I struggled with my insomnia, my eyes caught something on the screen. I was enthralled. I thought it was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. It was a hippopotamus. It was swimming blithely and gracefully underwater. Little fish hovered and swarmed around it. As I looked closer, I noticed that the fish were eating something off the hippopotamus’s skin and from inside its mouth. Suddenly, it occurred to me that I was witnessing a classic example of a symbiotic relationship: the animals were mutually benefiting from each other. The hippo was providing the fish with food while the fish were giving the hippo a good and thorough cleansing of its teeth and skin.

    This is, in fact, the case in nature. For their existence and survival, creatures rely on each other. Just as the birds and bees need the flowers for their sweet nectar, the flowers, to bloom, need the birds and bees too. Just as the insects need the trees for shelter and sustenance, the trees need the insects as safeguards against diseases and predators. All creatures have their own purposes in this world. Without this interdependence, the world will be bereft of life.

    This made me think about humans. Humans get their clothing, food, shelter, and medicines from nature. Unfortunately, humans, in their greed and desire to better themselves, also destroy nature. Are humans merely a destroyer? Why are they so powerful among all creatures? What is their purpose in the world? These are very complicated questions that require complicated answers. As I have told you before, I am not intelligent. Nevertheless, I was curious to know the answer. Since I couldn’t sleep anyway, I began to bore deeply into the nooks and crannies of my little brain and tried to look for the answer. But I found human beings to be a complex subject to tackle. I decided to find the answer by examining a subject which I know very well: myself!

    Who am I? What makes me different? What am I capable of? In many ways, I am the same as the other creatures. For my survival, I have to rely on nature. Everything I own and consume is a product of nature. However, I am different from the other creatures because I have the ability that goes beyond merely surviving. I have a mind. I can think. With my mind, I can study, reflect, and understand my world and everything in it. This enables me to become fully aware of the good that nature can provide and the ill effects that will follow after the mishandling of its bounties. Knowing these, I can make an intelligent choice, that is, choose the good from the bad.

    Choosing the good is not as easy as it may seem. What may be good for me may not be good for the other creatures and the environment. I must also bear in mind that my ability to think gives me power over the other creatures and that with this ability comes the responsibility to do well with nature. Since all creatures are dependent on each other, it behooves humans, being the most powerful, to see to it that this symbiotic relationship should not be endangered.

    Having found some answers to my questions, I felt satisfied. I know that I have a purpose in my life. You may ask: you know about this only now? Hey, I told you I am not intelligent. Filled with good feelings, I fell asleep without knowing it.